Hello! I'm a linguistics professor specializing in English grammar and syntax. I've dedicated my career to unraveling the intricacies of language, and I'm happy to help you understand the "who" vs. "whom" conundrum, specifically related to the pronoun "they."

## "They": Defying Traditional Norms

The pronoun "they" has been used in singular contexts for centuries, defying the traditional subject-verb agreement rules. While some grammatical purists still insist on using "he" or "she" as singular pronouns, "they" has gained significant traction, even in formal writing, as a gender-neutral and inclusive option. The singular "they" is used when the gender of the person is unknown or irrelevant, and it helps us move away from the binary constraints of traditional pronouns.

## "Who" vs. "Whom": A Matter of Case

Now, let's address the "who" versus "whom" dilemma. Both words are pronouns, but they operate in different grammatical cases:

* "Who" is a **<font color="red">subjective</font>** case pronoun, functioning as the **<font color="red">subject</font>** of a verb. Think of it as the one doing the action.
* Example: **<font color="red">Who</font>** ate the last cookie?

* "Whom" is an **<font color="red">objective</font>** case pronoun, acting as the **<font color="red">object</font>** of a verb or a preposition. It's the one receiving the action or connected by a preposition.
* Example: To **<font color="red">whom</font>** did you give the cookie?

## "They": Always Subjective

Here's the crucial point: **"they" always functions as a subject, regardless of whether it's singular or plural.** It never takes the objective case. This means that "whom" is never grammatically correct when used with "they."

Let's look at an example to clarify:

* Incorrect: You saw someone at the store, but you don't know whom they were.

* Correct: You saw someone at the store, but you don't know who they were.

In this case, "they" refers back to the subject "someone" and acts as the subject of the verb "were." Therefore, the correct pronoun to use is "who."

## Conclusion

To answer your question directly: "they" is always used with "who," never with "whom." This is because "they" functions as a subjective pronoun, and "who" is the subjective case form, while "whom" is the objective case form. While the "who" versus "whom" distinction might seem like a minor grammatical detail, understanding the difference ensures clarity and grammatical accuracy in your writing and speech.
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Whom is the object of a verb (i.e. the one being acted upon). The difference between who and whom is similar to that between he and him, or they and them. He and they are the subjects of verbs, and him and them are objects.read more >>